Tag Archives: Swinging

Modest Curves #wickedwednesday

Modesty Ablaze curving with friends

“Curves” is one of my favourite words. Neither bent nor straight,
neither callous nor sharp.

A curve is, by it’s very nature, smooth and sensual. A calming, comforting gradual change in shape and direction, that generally makes one feel warm and relaxed . . . and, as in this case . . . aroused and intoxicated. Wouldn’t you agree?

For more Calming Curves at this week’s Wicked Wednesday gently
suck on the button below.


Xxx- K

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Filed under Hotwives, Multiple Orgasms, Sex and Relationship, sexual empowerment for women, Sexual liberation, Swinging, Wicked Wednesday, womens Erotica

A Modest Swinging Question? #F4T

I’ve been prompted on a number of occasions over the past few months that I need to update my Swingers Club pages as some of the Clubs mentioned appear to no longer exist.

However, things have been so hectic this year . . . particularly since we returned from our summer holidays . . . that I still haven’t managed to properly research or make those changes.

Partly because Hubby and I don’t actually indulge in our “clubbing nights out” as much as we used to.

There was a period, a few years ago, where every other weekend seemed to be spent at our favourite “local” club . . . or if not there . . . meeting privately with “friends” we’d met there previously.

And I do admit to revelling in the excitement of discovering those new friends and new situations, and that wonderful “freedom” of discovering those new
fun and thrills.

But, as with all things I suppose, the excitement and expectation of that uncertainty of possible new adventures, began to wane.

I knew what I liked, I’d met lots of new people whose company I enjoyed . . . so our visits gradually became less regular.

Besides which, I’d also discovered some new fun and, new-to-us, fetish clubs that we’d learnt about through my new femdom hobby. And whilst there can sometimes be a cross-over between “swinging” and “bdsm” clubbing,
the two were, from my point-of-view at least, different experiences and a different direction.

But although our visits to our “local” have become less frequent, we do still visit occasionally and I must admit that when we do visit, we still sometimes meet and make new friends.

Anyway, it has definitely been some time since I have checked the links on my Swingers Page here, so I will be doing that in the coming week or so.

Therefore my “Question” to you all is that if any of you would like me to add some recommendations of clubs you have visited and particularly enjoyed . . . no matter where in the world you are . . . please do let me know and I shall add them to my pages.

In the meantime, for more thoughts and experiences of Freedom, visit this week’s Food For Thought by clicking upon the button below.

Food For Thought Friday

Xxx- K

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Filed under #FoodForThoughtFriday, erotic ebooks, Food For Thought, sexual empowerment for women, Sexual liberation, Swinging, The Modesty Ablaze Diaries

Tips when Dating People from Hookup Websites

Tips When Dating People from Hookup Websites 1

You might be faced with a boring weekend and want to date someone temporarily. Temporary can mean one night stands or a date with someone for two days without the intention of marrying them. If so, then sites for hookups that are the best way to go.

These kinds of websites are for people who want a casual relationship. Hooking up with someone can be exciting, thrilling, and fun and these are just some of the things that these sites aim to give its members. Most of the registered users there are not into long-term relationships so there’s the possibility that you and your match on the site understand that a weekend of dating is just temporary and it is not meant to last.

When dating someone, it is important to clarify whether you are looking for a quick roll on the hay or someone whom you want to spend the rest of your life with. When you are on hookup websites and you already find your match, here are some of the things that you need to remember when setting up a date with them.

Things to Remember when Hooking Up with Someone

Be Upfront with your Intentions
A healthy hookup relationship involves two people who know the things that they are looking for. If they make it clear that they just want to mess around, they won’t worry about the awkward things that usually happen in the morning.

No Stories about Childhood
The whole point of one night stands is that the people involved should carefully guard their feelings. They can’t do that when one of them starts to tell about his or her childhood or other significant life events that happened to them. Hooking up with someone can mean knowing their names but not their entire life story.

Be Careful with Involving your Feelings
There are times when a hookup can lead to a second or a third one. You might feel that you have finally met someone whom you can marry because they are different from the others. But if it is not reciprocated, you can get hurt in the process. Prevent them from scheming or using your feelings against you. If someone you hooked up with does not feel the same way about you, they can manipulate the relationship to their advantage.

Keep your Secrets
Do not divulge your deep secrets to someone whom you’ve just met in online dating sites. Know more about online dating in this link here. Even if you think that you will never meet them ever again after this particular weekend, technology always finds a way of connecting you two. They might blackmail you or ask for money especially if you have a secret that you won’t want your family and friends to know.

Do Not Take Pictures
Unless you decide to become exclusive, do not take photos together and post in on social media. Your family and friends might get a different interpretation of things and you don’t want to be known as someone who has sex with a stranger during weekends. Pictures can be used as evidence and it can be damaging for you especially if you plan to settle in the near future.

Set Rules
It is important to set boundaries and rules. Let the other person know about the things that you want or don’t want to happen when you sleep with someone. You might want to bolt in the middle of the night when the other is still sleeping or you might want to exchange phone numbers and set another date to see each other. Either way, don’t get pissed off when your hookup partner will not show up the next time.

Be Open with Awkward Situations
Awkwardness can’t be avoided sometimes. If certain things make you uncomfortable such as someone threw up because of too much wine during the first date, let them know. They might fart while in bed or you might find that they are hooking up with someone else. These are all totally fine. Let them know in private and laugh it off so that you won’t get the awkward vibe with each other the next time that you are together.

Let them Know if they Turn You Off
There are times when you could not help feeling disgusted with a weird habit that someone might have. If this is your first date and you feel uncomfortable, let them know. Maybe their way of getting off is different from yours. It’s totally fine if you can be upfront that they can get what they need from another person but not from you.


If your current date did not meet your expectations, find another one. The good news is that there are a lot of adult dating sites that can spawn a network of hookers on your local area. Save yourself the headache of going into the local bars and finding a hot companion for the weekend. The sites work and before you know it, you can find yourself with a different partner every week.

As long as you know how to be safe and you establish your boundaries, hooking up with someone should never be a problem. Know at least the name of the person you are hooking up but protect your heart in the process as well. Even if your current partner does not meet your expectations, who knows, the other one may have marriage potential.

As you may have gathered, this has been a sponsored post,
but you won’t be surprised to know just how much I LOVE meeting new people . . . and it has certainly worked for me. LOL !!!
So I hope you have enjoyed reading. – Xxx – K

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Filed under Multiple Orgasms, sexual empowerment for women, Sexual liberation, Sexy Lingerie, Swinging

Modest Work-outs #sinfulsunday

Modesty Ablaze new Exercise routine

I have been thinking more and more recently, that I needed to get out and exercise more. You know what I mean . . . some strenuous stretching . . . and breathtaking lunging.

So . . . several Saturdays ago . . . I began a series of one-to-ones with my new “personal trainer”.

And I must say it really, really was, a most enjoyable session, for all of us !!!

You can discover more Stretches and Lunges I’m sure, by pushing . . . up
and down . . . on the Sinful Sunday lips below!

Sinful Sunday

Xxx – K

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Filed under #sinfulsunday, 3 somes, Make Love Not Porn, Multiple Orgasms, sexual empowerment for women, Sexual liberation, Sinful Sunday, womens Erotica

Pour Me A Glass Members Update . . . mid-August

Modesty Ablaze Pour Me Update Mid August

After all the very excitable messages I received in the first few days after my
Pour Me August Newsletter, I could hardly hold-back on uploading the “climax” to that fun now could I.

So, I hope you will enjoy this little finale. I certainly enjoyed it at the time . . . and, of course, I still enjoy the memories every time I have watched it since.

Just click on the preview screen above and enter your updated Members Password details as normal.

I haven’t decided on September’s Pour Me A Glass Members content just yet . . . so you still have time to add your special requests to the suggestions box, and I will see what I can do. It could be more fun from another evening with Lover 20 . . . or perhaps one of my other hotel adventures . . . or perhaps you would like to suggest your own kinky theme or fetish. In the, unlikely (lol !!!), event that I haven’t indulged in something similar . . . you might just inspire me to try!!!

But, in the meantime, enjoy !!!

As before, if you are already a “Pour Me A Glass” Member, you may log-in with your Members Password details >here< . . . or, there is more information on how to subscribe, >here<.

I realise they may not always be to everyone’s tastes . . . but as I always say . . . as long as it’s fun and completely consensual, I will certainly consider all of your themes and suggestions.

Xxx – K

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Filed under #bodypositivity, #PourMeAGlass, Body Positivity, Hotwives, Multiple Orgasms, Pour Me a Glass of Wine, sexual empowerment for women, Sexual liberation

Top Tips on How to Meet Other Swingers

Tips on how to meet other swingers

Having exciting and satisfying sex is one of the most important things in a person’s life. Not only does it help people feel better about themselves but also increases their chances of being successful in other areas of their life. Swingers seem to understand this perfectly and that’s why they lead such an interesting lifestyle. However, men and women from the swingers dating scene sometimes have a hard time finding couples who might be interested in swinging. Therefore, if you and your lover can’t find other swingers, these top tips are bound to help you with that challenge.

Go to Swingers Dating Sites

If you and your lover are new to all this, you are probably too shy to meet other swingers in person. Newbie couples usually choose this option because they don’t know how to approach other swinger couples and because they don’t want to be seen enjoying this lifestyle in public. If you have the same problems, make sure you create an account on a dating site for swingers and thus meet other like-minded couples. Once you find an interesting couple, you can meet them in person. Don’t worry; these people are very discreet.

Visit Local Swingers Clubs

In case you are not that shy, you should probably visit some of the swingers clubs in your town. People who go there are looking for the same things as you. Therefore, it’s safe to say that visiting these clubs is your best chance to meet the perfect swinger couple. All you have to do is dress nicely, be confident, and show people that you know how to have fun. This is the best way to impress other swinger couples.

Approach the Couple Casually

The best way to approach a swinger couple is by ordering them drinks and introducing yourself. However, make sure you do that casually without even mentioning sex. First of all, you want to know what they are like and whether or not you are good for each other. If you decide that you’re a good match, you can talk about the things you want to do with them.

Know How to Respectfully Bring Up the Lifestyle

Bringing up the swinger lifestyle and sex is the most important thing in this conversation. This is why you have to do it in a respectful and decent way. You can’t just say “Hey, we like you, we want to have sex with you tonight. Are you interested?” You have to be smooth about it. Say that you are new to this and ask them something along the lines of “Are you also newbies? How long have you been in the lifestyle?” This is the best way to bring up the topic without making anyone feel uncomfortable. Then, when everyone is relaxed enough, you can talk about what you like to do in bed. Also, if you want to have sex with them, you need to ask them nicely. “Hey guys, do you want to come to our home and play?” This simple invitation usually works.

As you may have gathered, this has been a sponsored post,
but you won’t be surprised to know just how much I LOVE Swinging . . . and it has certainly worked for me. LOL !!!
So I hope you have enjoyed reading. – Xxx – K

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Filed under Hotwives, Multiple Orgasms, Sex Toys, Sex Toys Reviews, Sexual liberation, Swinging

A Beginner’s Guide to Swinging_REALSWINGERS

A Swingers Guide to Realswingers
Swinger hookups are not for everyone, but those who like the idea and believe in open relationships can enjoy sex with other people without feeling the guilt that follows cheating. Also, many people out there fantasize about watching their partner have sex with someone else, and swinging is perfect in this case because this fantasy can be fulfilled with a clear conscience. Check out our beginner’s guide before you enter the world of swinging so you get a better sense of what to expect.

Who Can Get Into Swinging?

Singles and couples alike are welcome to join a swinging community of their choice, while it’s important to note that single women are the most popular. Couples can find other couples to swap partners, but you should keep in mind that inviting a single girl to join you is also a form of swinging and the most popular one. The biggest challenge for newbies, in general, is to figure out what they like and how far they can go. Then and only then can they start looking for partners to swing with.

Soft Swing to Dip Your Toes In

A soft swing is perfect for first timers as it involves kissing and touching without going too far. You can do it with your partner present or watch him or her kiss another person or multiple people. This is a very gentle introduction into the world of swinging that is recommended as the first step before you can be sure what you’re comfortable with and what’s off the table.

Voyeurism and Exhibitionism

Lots of people fantasize about having sex in front of someone else or watching their partner sleep with another person. Swinging fulfills this fantasy and allows couples to watch each other get it on with someone else or have someone watch them in bed. The rules to these scenes are established beforehand and must be agreed upon by every person involved.

Peak Swap

Peak swap is what most people think swinging actually is – having sex with anyone but your partner. Certain variations are allowed, but the point is to engage in sexual activity with a new person or a regular swinging partner, just not your significant other.

Same-Sex Swinging

Same-sex swinging is more popular among women than men, but obviously, that doesn’t mean all gay women partake in swinging. They’re rather good at setting the boundaries and are open-minded to a point unimaginable by most straight couples.


So many men have this fantasy of having sex with two girls at a time, and swinging allows them to live out their dreams. This is precisely why single women are more sought after than single men, and this is the activity of choice of many couples who like to spice things up a little every once in a while. Others use threesomes to explore how far they want to go with swinging, watching as their partner takes another person. Alternatively, you can try having sex with someone else with your partner watching, and see if you feel comfortable enough to pursue swinging on a more regular basis.

As you may have gathered, this has been a sponsored post,
but you won’t be surprised to know just how much I LOVE Swinging! And it’s certainly worked for me . . . LOL !!!
So I hope you have enjoyed reading. – Xxx – K

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Filed under 3 somes, Body Positivity, Hotwives, Multiple Orgasms, Sex Toys, Sex Toys Reviews, sexual empowerment for women, Swinging

5 Things You Need to Know before You Get into Swinging

5 Things you need to know before you get into swinging

Most couples, especially men and women who have been together for a long time, are always looking for new ways to keep things fresh and exciting in the bedroom. Sex with another couple, better known as swinging, provides them with a chance to do exactly that. And while having sex with another couple can be rather exciting, finding the right people for this is not always easy. You can’t just go to the swingers dating site and choose the first couple that sends you a message. No, you have to get to know these people before you get into bed with them. This is why we are going to talk about the 5 things you need to know before you get into swinging.

Talk To Your Lover First

Suggesting something like this to your partner out of the blue is never a good thing. They might think that you have some problems in the relationship or that you don’t find them attractive anymore. So, if you want to talk about this with your lover, make sure you bring it up in a casual conversation. This will allow you to see where they stand on swinging. If they are okay with it, then you can suggest you try it out together.

Know Where To Look For Other Swingers

In case you and your spouse want to try out swinging, you have to know where to find other swingers in your town. You can’t just approach any couple you meet and ask them to have sex with you because this is sexual harassment. If you want to find another swinger couple, you have to visit swinger clubs in your town. There, you will find a lot of men and women who are looking for the exact same thing as you.

If One Of You Is Jealous This Won’t Work

Swinging implies that you have sex with other people and if one of you is jealous, this simply won’t work. If seeing your lover with another person makes you jealous, you won’t be able to enjoy swinging. In this case, it’s better not to try it because it can ruin what you have with your spouse.

It’s About Spicing Up Your Sex Life

One of the most important things you have to remember is that swinging is about spicing up your sex life, not an excuse to sleep with other men and women. Swinging is supposed to help you have better sex with your lover. If you are trying to find a new person to sleep with, swinging is not for you.

Be Discreet About It

You should know that most people don’t have nice things to say about swingers. So, if you don’t want to be judged in public, be discreet about your adventures.
If, however, you want to talk about it, talk, but don’t mention the names of people you are having sex with. Respect their privacy because they might not want to be known as swingers.

As you may have gathered, this has been a sponsored post,
but you won’t be surprised to know just how much I LOVE Swinging! LOL !!!
So I hope you have enjoyed reading. – Xxx – K

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Modestly Swinging #KOTW #wickedwednesday

Modesty Ablaze Swinging

My earliest experience of swinging was over 30 years ago, shortly after our marriage had blossomed into our “open relationship” fun as a consequence of my The More I Have experience.

I’d told Hubby of my curiosity about Swinging as part of our “as long as it’s fun for both of us” desires and fantasies. This was before the days of the internet of course, but we had come across details of a Private and Exclusive Swingers Club in one of the Sunday papers I believe.

It was held at a disco-type night club in Kensington and so Hubby and I, very nervously, decided to apply. I remember we sat in the car several streets away for almost an hour on that first night, trying to build-up the courage to go along and knock on the door.

The club itself was actually quite stylish, with a quiet upstairs bar and a larger dance floor area downstairs. The DJ alternated the lighting in sync with the music he was playing . . . so bright and flashing for the more upbeat songs, and darker and more subdued for the slower music. And once an hour I think, he would announce a “lights down” sequence of around 15 minutes when the lights went almost off completely!

We seemed to be the youngest couple there and despite being interested in some of the scanty outfits on display, I felt awkward and uncomfortable and not at all flattered, or tempted, by any of the couples that approached us. Everyone was polite and and quite friendly, but neither of us felt at-ease enough, nor aroused enough, to wish to engage in anything more than just polite replies or general conversation (when that was even possible above the music, at least downstairs). And I certainly didn’t want to stay on the dance floor when the lights went out!

We lasted three or four hours, before agreeing it just wasn’t for us. And that was the end of our “swingers clubs” experience . . . though not the end of our other fun! . . . for over 20 years.

But our other fun did continue to evolve. Firstly just me sharing the accounts of my “fun nights out” with Hubby when I returned home, (as chronicled in my Modesty Ablaze Diaries), into eventually inviting him along quite regularly to join-in with one of my particular lovers who was quite happy for three-some play-fun as well.

And it was those wonderful evenings that often had us talking again about re-visiting our Swingers experience. No, not at the same club . . . but 20 years on and searching on the internet . . . we found that there was one particular club within easy reach!

So . . . still nervous, but no longer having to sit in the car for an hour beforehand, we took the plunge and . . . over the coming months . . . got very wet!

So much so, that for the best part of that year, it became almost our regular Saturday night out.

The club itself was admittedly more tacky than our Kensington experience,
but . . . older and wiser . . . my own perceptions and expectations had changed so much, and we both felt much more at ease. The hosts were welcoming and laid-back, the clientele seemed much more of our own age, and the no-pressure atmosphere just made it a much easier and more natural-feeling experience.

We had the especially good fortune that our “meet and greet newcomers chaperone”, was a really gorgeous and lovely blonde lady that had both of us swooning. And although we just mingled and chatted, without indulging on that first night, she was the first reason we went back . . . and back . . . and back.

And it was here that we first met some really lovely, fun people, both couples and single-gentlemen . . . and experienced some amazingly fun playtimes with . . . some of whom we still see today. The photograph at the top of this post, which I have used on my pages here before, is a wonderful example of one of those special friendships that just keeps on keeping-on.

I do realise though that Swinging is not for everybody and my advice for anyone curious about making those first initial steps is . . . of course . . . to talk openly and honestly with one’s partner about every possible scenario or worry you may have, before you actually visit your first club or event. It’s just common-sense really . . . but, if something doesn’t feel comfortable then, obviously, just say “thank you, but not tonight”.

In my experience, people always understand that “no means no” and won’t take offence or keep on asking. And there will always be a member of staff you can speak to if you did feel under pressure or that you were the subject of unwanted attention.

At our “local”, most of the attendees are other couples, though they do allow entrance to a few “selected single males”. Occasionally single ladies do attend alone as well.

It’s often difficult when meeting and chatting with couples for the first time, for both partners of each couple to feel interest and attraction. So I am very lucky in that Hubby is often happy to take the role of voyeur without necessarily needing to participate fully. But there have still been occasions when he has said that “thank you, but not tonight”, before I have, on my behalf.

And that is the golden rule for us . . . if one or the other of us is not comfortable . . . chatting and polite conversation is as far as it will go. And that is the beauty of a club, it allows one to mingle and move around . . . and move on. Although we have visited a private party as opposed to a club, that has only been through people we have previously met in the club situation.

Some of my club, and party, experiences are mentioned in myUnmasked edition of “The Modesty Ablaze Diaries” and I do have aSwingers Club page . . . many of which I haven’t visited, so can’t vouch for personally or even be sure they are still current, but all have been mentioned to me in the past by “friends” or visitors to my pages here. So, if you have any recommendations of your own, please do let me know !!!

You can read . . . and share . . . more experiences and thoughts on “Swinging”
at the current KOTW from kissing the lips below.

Or from visiting this week’s Wicked Wednesday,
by clicking on the button below !!!


Xxx- K

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Filed under #KinkoftheWeek, Hotwives, Kink of the Week, Sexual liberation, Swinging, Wicked Wednesday

Modestly Swinging #sinfulsunday

Modesty Ablaze Swinging 1

No, not that sort of “Swinging” silly . . . that’s possibly for later this evening!

But, still with my feet raised in the air, swinging of a more relaxing, less energetic, kind . . .

Modesty Ablaze Swinging 2

. . . from a lovely, and relaxing, southern summer earlier this year.

Visit this week’s Sinful Sunday . . . to see just how lots of other people have been relaxing recently!!!

Sinful Sunday

Xxx – K

Pour Modesty Ablaze A Glass of Wine


Filed under #sinfulsunday, sexual empowerment for women, Sexual liberation, Sinful Sunday, Swinging