Modestly Starting Out

Modesty Ablaze Salad DaysI think many “bloggers” may see starting their own blog-page as almost a cleansing, or healing process.

And as this week’s theme at Wicked Wednesday is “Healing” . . . and “Starting Out” is the subject of Food For Thought Friday, I thought it an opportune moment to offer my own thoughts on both, by answering this week’s #F4TF questions.

How did you first become aware of the blogging community?

This will sound very strange I’m sure, but I actually became aware of “blogging” from a random TV programme that popped-up whilst channel-hopping one evening. It was one of those technology programs . . . you know the sort of thing, all about robotics and transistors and circuit-boardy things . . . the sort of thing that Hubby loves but I find terribly boring, and certainly nothing to do with “sex-blogging” at all.

Rather it was all about the explosion of “normal people” using blogging sites to post about their hobbies or interests. I joked to Hubby “I could start a blog on how much I love sex”. He said “I dare you! You could post all those diary entries you’ve been writing for years and years” . . . and so a few days later Modesty Ablaze was born.

In my “research” for other ladies blogging in that field, I think I first came across Marie’s Rebels Notes, and from there Sinful Sunday at Molly’s Daily Kiss . . . and from there Scavenger Hunt . . . and so on.

What made you decide to take the plunge and join in?

It was really more of a “dip” for me, rather than a “plunge”. But to my huge surprise, I soon began receiving messages and comments to say how much people enjoyed reading my posts . . . so I felt empowered to carry on posting more.

How did you decide on the type of content you would share?

As I said above, it really was a case of initially just posting excerpts from the “personal diaries” that I’d been compiling for years and years. But actually receiving comments from other people about how my diaries and experiences were helping people in their own relationships . . . or at least motivating or encouraging them to want to change things or perhaps communicate more with their own partners . . . was wonderfully fulfilling and rewarding in a way I’d never imagined.

But as I began discovering, and being recommended to investigate, lots of other “erotic writers and bloggers”, I knew that my diary-posts were just that, simply personal diaries and not in the same creative and literary sphere as more accomplished writers (such as the wonderful Kay Jaybee for example). And that realisation certainly stalled . . . and almost stopped . . . my Modesty Ablaze blog for a time.

But Molly’s Sinful Sunday, and Dee’s Scavenger Hunt, appealed to my slight exhibitionistic tendencies . . . and my feeling that one should never take oneself too seriously . . . so I began to lower my Modesty Mask a little more and found myself joining in those, and other, blogging-memes. And as time passed by, I began adding some of my other experiences of the enjoyment and freedom of open-relationships, the lovely Boobday Friday, my Polaroids Past . . . and even my FemDom fun.

Have you achieved the goals you wanted when you started blogging and have these changed over time?

There was never any specific goal in my starting Modesty Ablaze, other than just as a simple dare and to celebrate the fun and love of my experiences. But as time has gone by, I suppose I have become much more “serious” about the importance of promoting sex-positive and body-positive issues, which are so often suppressed and shamed in “mainstream / normal” society.

What have been the most positive aspects of being a blogger?

By far the most positive aspect of Modesty Ablaze, has been receiving so many lovely emails and messages of encouragement and thanks from people from all over the world and from so many different situations and relationships. To learn that Modesty may have helped or inspired in some way . . . or even just made people laugh and feel better about themselves . . . is a wonderful feeling.
But I also feel privileged to have met in person, lots of lovely people who have inspired and motivated me on my Modesty Ablaze journey. It is that sense of belonging that makes one feel special to be part of such a wonderfully sex-positive community.

Have there been any negative aspects of being a blogger?

No !!!

Modesty Ablaze London Sex Blogger

For more answers to the questions of “Starting Out” and “Healing”
just click on the buttons below.



Xxx – K



Filed under #FoodForThoughtFriday, Body Positivity, Food For Thought, sexual empowerment for women, Sexual liberation, Wicked Wednesday

13 Responses to Modestly Starting Out

  1. You are a wonderful ambassador for the sex blogging and body positive community modesty. I love to visit your blog xx

  2. Love your positivity – very interesting post – I agree blogging and writing really do help to heal and liberate 😉 x

  3. Your “don’t take yourself too seriously” attitude really shines through. Your photos and snippets often make me grin, and your sense of fun is contagious.

    I always know that visiting your blog is going to leave me smiling. This is always a “feel good” space, and I really admire your ability to consistently maintain that vibe. 🙂

  4. It’s wonderful reading how you started out, and I for one have always enjoyed your blog and want to enjoy it for many years to come. I never realized I was one of the first you came across, as I always thought you had been blogging long before me…

    Rebel xox

  5. Great post I love that you continue to be inspired and to inspire us…
    Indie xx

  6. Jo

    It’s so wonderful to read about your history as a blogger, K! I didn’t know that you originally wrote diary entries… and now I’m quite keen to read some of them! I think you’re right – blogging (writing / self reflection / creativity in general) can be incredibly healing, even if that’s not why the blog was initially started. x

  7. I’ve always enjoyed the bare-faced cheekiness of your photos. Your positivity and adventurousness has, I’m sure, been an inspiration to many and provided joy to all who’ve visited your site.

  8. I love this, and I am delighted that I helped you along in your blogging journey in some way. You always make me smile and laugh and you inspire me to be braver with my own Scavenger Hunt pictures


  9. I love to view your photographs and I am planning to get more familiar with your diaries very soon – your lighthearted approach is very refreshing and just what I need many times when I log on! Thanks so much for sharing your joi de vivre with us!

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  12. NPE

    And a great decision it was! You have a wonderful blog!

  13. It was very neat to read what got you started! I’ve never actually seen a program that mentions blogging directly so that was interesting to hear. I’m glad you’ve stuck around.

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